Nathaniel Lachenmeyer

Anosognosia

On the contrary you knew you were not psychiatrically ill and that that in fact was the threat they held over you—a false diagnosis and an engineered pattern of behavior constructed at great expense of money and manpower using a heretofore unknown mindreading and thought/voice insertion technology to make you look like you had the psychiatric illness schizophrenia and given that denial lack of insight was itself a symptom of course every protest could be twisted into confirmation. But what alternative did you have? No their games their lies couldn’t keep you from trying every day to break through to reach someone anyone beyond the constructed world who would say enough is indeed enough I won’t be a collaborator witting or unwitting anymore I will stand up for freedom and the rights of the individual and all the things that used to make this country great I will stand with you. It hadn’t happened yet and maybe it never would but you had to try you had to keep writing keep working to expose what they had done because right was right so you had to do it no matter what the cost to you personally loss of career reputation family your son your home even your dog and no matter what they threatened including that you might actually die on that street because one man’s freedom is every man and woman’s freedom and what is more important than that? Nothing. Some fights you cannot you must not back down from even if every force in the world is aligned against you and new technologies have upended all the rules because dignity matters freedom matters truth matters even more than winning than losing does. No there is no reason nor will there ever be as long as there is any hope left and even after that to give in or to give up.

Nathaniel Lachenmeyer is an award-winning disabled author of books for children and adults. His first book, The Outsider, which takes as its subject his late father’s struggles with schizophrenia and homelessness, was published by Broadway Books. His most recent book, an all-ages graphic novel called Nathaniel has forthcoming/ recently published poems, stories and essays with X-R-A-Y, North Dakota Quarterly, Citron Review, Reed Magazine, Potomac Review, Epiphany, Permafrost, Berkeley Poetry Review, About Place Journal and DIAGRAM. Nathaniel lives outside Atlanta with his family. www.NathanielLachenmeyer.com.